This is my new tattoo. Was something I have been thinking about for a little while and I went passed a tattoo shop yesterday and thought it was time. It hurt like a bitch but it was definitely worth it. So far I have had mixed reactions- but i  love it and that's the main thing.

Hi Bloggers and Bloggettes.

Long time no talk. I have been AWOL for the last 6 months. There have been a multitude of reasons for this. First off I found out I was pregnant and was so so so excited. At first I didn't blog as I wanted to keep it a secret until after 12 weeks and I knew I wouldn't be able to not write about it.

Then unfortunately I felt something was wrong at around 11 weeks and went for a scan. The bub didn't make it. I was so devastated. After that I couldn't write. I could barely talk. I shut down in a major way. My depression got bad, my anxiety flared up and I was a serious mess. Thus no blogging.

I am back under the care of a psychiatrist and a psychologist, taking my medication and now am feeling good again. Good enough to write. So much has happened in the last 6 months. Some of it bad- as above, but some of it good too.

I blogged a couple of times about how I wasn't happy in my job. I have finally taken the plunge and am working for myself. This is AWESOME! It has been the best thing ever for our family. I am happier and more available to my family and finally have some work/life balance that I have been craving for so long.

My little man is growing up (and getting cuter by the minute) and he starts Kindy this year. He is so excited- as am I. He is going to be so adorable in his little school uniform.

I am excited about 2013. I feel like I can let 2012 go and embrace the future. I guess all of the counselling and medication is helping too because I am finally taking care of ME again. I went to the dentist for the first time in 20 YEARS. OMG, I can't believe I actually did it. I have to admit that there was some serious shaking in my boots going on- quite literally too. The dental assistant had to plug my earphones into my ipod because my hands were shaking so much I just couldn't do it. Blt, despite my ridiculous dental phobia, I went. It wasn't that bad actually- 8 fillings. Considering I hadn't been to a dentist since I was 9, this was a pretty good outcome.

I just today went to the specialist about my sleep apnoea and got hooked up with the Darth Vader  cpap machine so hopefully I will soon stop waking up feeling like I could die within the hour.

Also I guess another significant decision I have made is to have weight loss surgery. This is something I have thought about for a long time but have never gone through with- until now. I have been a yoyo dieter for years. I can lose weight but I can never seem to keep it off. I always put it back on- with interest. As I am suffering from obesity related conditions at the moment (such as sleep apnoea, fatty liver and insulin resistance) I have decided enough is enough. My doctor has approved me for lap band surgery and my psychiatrist has also written a letter to the surgeon supporting my decision. I have yet to have my consultation with the surgeon though- so he could decide not to do the surgery, but I am hopeful that he will.

I feel good about this year and where I am at in my life now. I love my husband, my son and my job- all in all I am a pretty happy camper. So bring on 2013 - let's do it.

Now I am happy again- no doubt you'll be hearing from me more regularly. Look forward to chatting.

Rhia xxx